Named as Harper’s Bazaar top planners Jove Meyer is a truly heart-driven event pro who finds inspiration everywhere. In my conversation with Jove we talk about difference between expertise and execution, advocating for the LGBTQ+ community and the Ally Pledge he created. We talk about his niche, the kinds of collaborations that make his heart happy – enter the Planner Dinning Club! We also find out that we have the strangest in thing in common.

Connect with Jove: Instagram | Website

Video Transcription:

Maya: Welcome to What You See Is What You Get – growth through meaningful connection and collaboration. Today, my guest is Jove Meyer. Jove has planned and designed his best friend’s wedding in the summer of 2008. And that is how he got started. And fast forward, he now is listed as Harper’s Top Planners in the world, which is an amazing feat. It is such an illustrious list and Joe completely deserves to be on that list. He is smart, he’s funny, he’s heart-driven and incredibly creative.

So, I am very excited to be able to talk to him about where does he get his creativity from? How does he build his network, how he advocates for the LGBTQ plus community and how that is a core value for his business. Welcome Jove Meyer. Hi Jove. 

Jove: Hi Maya. I’m doing well. How about yourself?
Maya: How are you?
Jove: I’m doing well. How about yourself? 
Maya: I’m doing really well. So before we jump into this whole, who are you, what do you do? Tell me more about the background behind you. I’m fascinated. Where are you? Where is this? What is it?

Jove: I am in Brooklyn, this is my apartment. This is – the one of the first two projects I did when I moved in. This is an old art book, The History of Art, and I made wallpaper out of it. So you can see, this is six or seven years ago, pretty simple project, crafty, cheerful, on a budget. And this was the other project I did right away, which is a reclaimed wood wall. I knew that I needed a beautiful character wall in this space. And so, this is what I did. And the wall, I think I can tilt you and show you, it goes all the way. 

Maya: That’s gorgeous, Jove. 

Jove: The whole, the first thing you see when you walk into the apartment is this wall, this reclaimed wood wall. And it’s one of my favorite things and it just changed the space immediately. 

Maya: It’s beautiful. You are, at the end of the day, a wedding planner. But what people don’t know about you is that you love redecorating homes and you do all sorts of fun things. Those two things seem weirdly different from each other, but also I’m guessing very complimentary to each other.
So tell me more about, who’s Jove Meyer. 

Jove: Yeah, I think I like to say I’m a designer first and just good at planning. I’d love to design parties and spaces that reflect people’s style, personality, relationship, love story. To me, I think designing any space is similar. A party is held in a space, so when I work with couples, I design the space to reflect who they are.
And it’s similar in a home. This home is very reflective of Jove, seven or eight years ago, when things were a little more vintage, a little hipster, a little, nothing here is new. Everything in this home is used or vintage. So that was – I think, a big trend many years ago. 

And then the most recent project I designed on Fire Island is the complete opposite. It’s bright, it’s colorful, it’s airy, it’s open, it’s new. So it’s where I started and where I’m going. And it’s been a really interesting journey in between. And yeah, so I think design is what I do and planning is what I’m good at. Spreadsheets, organizational timelines, vendor-relationships I love, but the design is what makes me the most happy.

Maya: Yes. Anybody who’s seen your work can see you pull inspiration from so many different places. Like, nothing that you do looks the same, if you would. It all has a very elevated feel, but it never looks like one thing. If- there’s always like fun, little twists to it. And I think,-

Jove: Thank you.

Maya: the work is beautiful.
Something you just said was, you love collaborating with the vendors and bringing in different people. What You See Is What You Get is all about connection and collaboration. How much does collaboration feature, for you, in the work you do-design or planning? 

Jove: Collaboration is crucial. For me, I come up with a vision or ideas inspired by my couples or my clients, but I can’t bring anything to life without my creative partners.

Literally, Jove Meyer Events wouldn’t exist without the vendors that we work with, that we partner with, and that we bring events to life with. I come up with the idea, but they physically make it. I’m not a florist. I’m not a stationer, I’m not- I don’t own event rentals. All of these pieces are integral for the design of a party.

I understand lighting, but I don’t get up on a ladder and install it. I just know that it has to be an, a dimmer, it has to be a certain hue and I don’t like LED. So, there are things that I’ve learned over the years that make me an expert in different areas, but I don’t execute. So absolutely, my creative partners are the lifeblood of the company without their hard work, their creativity, their talent, their expertise, nothing would be possible.

Maya: When you’re working with somebody, what do you appreciate the most about them? 

Jove: It’s many different things, but I think the most important thing I appreciate is who they are and what they bring to the table that makes them the most happy. I think as small business owners, people don’t realize we have to do everything. We do HR, payroll, staffing, transportation, we do it all, but everyone has something that makes them spark, that makes them light up. And that’s what I want to focus on. 

What is it that- is your spark that you’re going to contribute to this event. And for me, once I find that I want to lean into it. And for all of our relationships, I give a general broad stroke picture. This is the inspiration, this is the vibe, this is where we’re going, but I don’t micromanage how the vendor does it creatively.

Because if I’m partnering with someone, I’m not here to micromanage you, I want your art in this space under these, different descriptions and this vibe. So, I think it is, it’s true collaboration, but I love when people geek out about one particular thing and that’s their specialty for me. When someone is niche, I get really turned on. 

Maya: What would you say is your niche?

Jove: Oh, that’s a good question. I think you have to ask someone else. I think my niche is bold, colorful, modern, fun celebrations for all couples. My niche’s not dated, not classic, not gaudy, and no disrespect to those designs. Those are intentional choices. They’re quite popular. They’ve been around a long time. Just doesn’t do anything for me. 

You’ll never see me do other than at the Plaza where gold candelabra is with draping, orchids and crystals. It’s just not who I am and it doesn’t spark any joy for me. And so I think, yeah, when people have a niche they love, and they can express that in their own beautiful art form. To me, that’s magic.

Maya: When you’re being creative, and you’re thinking about bringing in collaborators, what are the kinds- and I know they need to bring joy and they need to be really good at it, but what sort of like day to day things do you look for in somebody when you’re building a relationship? Like when that somebody comes to you and says, Jove, I really want to work with you. 

What sort of the, everybody has a checklist- I don’t care who you are, everybody, you may have an actual checklist or you may have a subconscious checklist, but what are the things that you look for when you’re considering somebody new to work with, or even for that matter, when you’re interviewing a couple to work with?

Jove: Yeah, I think for sure, we all have a checklist, right? Whether we’re dating, shopping, hiring someone, like we all have things that matter to us in the relationships we have in life. And with our creative partners, for me, creativity, heart, hard work, and authenticity are probably the four things that really matter the most to me. 

We do get inquiries quite often. Hi, how do I work with you? To me, that’s a disingenuine inquiry. You’re just literally, Hi, comma, you haven’t put my name, you haven’t done your homework. You’re just doing mass outreach. And my company is not built on massive companies and massive outreach, but we focus on working with small businesses, fellow small businesses as we’re a small business, primarily owned and operated by women, people of color and queer people.

So to me, if you haven’t done the homework and your email says, hi, comma? And you’re sending it to Jove Meyer Events. Like, you’re not really the person for us, and it’s not a genuine connection or relationship. 

So, I love people that dig in, that do their research, they do their homework, and they really want to create magic together instead of just making money, if that makes sense. Of course, we want to make money. It’s a business, I have to pay for this place that I live, and these clothes that I wear, and all the things in life. 

Maya: Yeah, but there’s a way to do it. 

Jove: Totally. And I think for me, that’s what’s most important, those four things that I mentioned.

Maya: What’s the most, like what’s the best sort of opening you’ve ever gotten from somebody? Like, now we know when somebody goes, Hi, comma, you’re like, okay, so yeah. Doesn’t work, but what would be like in your years of now doing this, what’s been like the most where you were like, okay, this person, this- maybe wasn’t like necessarily your first choice, the first time round, but like over time, what’s one that stands out in your mind that you’re like, Yeah, that was good.

Jove: Honestly, it’s consistency. The- there are certain vendors that are authentically who they are. They genuinely want to work with you. They reach out in an authentic way over email or Instagram, and they also genuinely connect with you. So they follow your social media, they liked your posts, they know what you’re doing. They genuinely want to work with you. So they’re invested in your life in a kind way. 

And to me that keeps people top of mind. And they’re like, for example, Andres and Nico, the lovely photographers here in New York City. We met once at a conference where there were a lot of people. I have a terrible memory, but they followed up. They sent a thoughtful rainbow gift out of nowhere, knowing that I love color. It wasn’t a birthday. It wasn’t a holiday. It was just like, thinking of you. And then I was like, Oh my friend’s having a big 40th birthday. He- he wants to gay photographer, he doesn’t have a lot of money, what’s the lowest rate you could do it, so I could gift it to him.

And they were like, we’ll do it for free. And I said, no, that’s like way to good, that wasn’t my intention. But that started the relationship. They had the best time, they met all these other queer people in New York. And then now, we’re working on one or two weddings together. 

So, it was a genuine relationship of give and take. And I think, they come to my mind because it didn’t feel transactional, didn’t feel like, I’m reaching out to you because I need something from you, even though they do. And I need something from them, it is transactional. But it was so genuine, and they follow up every now and again. And it just feels like a relationship, not a transaction.

Maya: That is, I think that, I think you said it, it was, it came from because it made me, made them think of you. It wasn’t, there wasn’t a reason. It wasn’t like on the marketing cycle, essentially, is what you were saying. 

Jove: Yes. I appreciate all the gifts we get on that cycle, but it’s also the personal touch, the thoughtfulness, that intentional outreach. And some people cast a wide net and they need a lot of business.

We work in a smaller world, but we don’t work with a ton of people all the time. We’re not in the mass market, we’re in the niche, small market. And so when you’re in, but to get in, just takes a little bit more finesse, I think. 

Maya: I think you have to get to know each other’s strengths. You have to get to know, what’s good, what works? What doesn’t work, are you aligned?

And I think you mentioned that sort of, you work with people of color, minority-owned businesses, female- strongly female owned businesses, and of course, queer businesses. And I think alignment at that point, that’s a very, now of course it’s become sort of “the thing” to be diverse and inclusive, but you’ve been doing it.

It has been part of your company principles, mission statement, whatever, different people call it different things. It’s being a part of your core values, for as long as Jove Meyer Events has existed. Does that sort of play a role in when somebody reaches out to you that they align with you on those things? Or, is it, they don’t necessarily have to align. Like, how do you feel about those?

Jove: Yeah, there has to be a hundred percent alignment. There’s no space for hate in an industry of love, period. And I always have those values, but we didn’t have a clear way to express them or hold people accountable to them. And so, I wouldn’t work with anyone who was racist, homophobic, sexist, sizeist, ableist, ageist, antisemitic, the list of hate goes on that we just will not work with.

Especially as a gay man, who’s faced a lot of discrimination in work, in life. And to me, someone’s planning the happiest day of their life and someone is going to make that difficult for them because they disagree with something that a person has no control over. It’s unacceptable. 

So, the- last year I actually created the, my Ally Pledge, which took months and months of work, and research, and learning, and studying, and listening. And I make it really clear. Anyone who wants to collaborate with us has to review and sign that pledge. And to me, it’s a deal breaker. If you don’t want to sign it, if you don’t respect all humans equally, then we’re not going to work together. You’re not going to receive my client’s money. And we’re not going to collaborate.

And to me, it’s a no brainer. Nothing in this pledge, is a choice. There is no religion in the pledge, and there is no politics in the pledge. It’s literally choosing to love people for who they are. And to me, if you can’t do that at your core, we can’t work together. 

Maya: That is very powerful. It’s true. There is no place, as you said, in the business of love, why would you choose to not love everybody. Were there- when you’ve asked people to sign your pledge, your Ally Pledge. And I know that there was actually a lot of businesses in the wedding industry, in the events industry have actually adopted your pledge as part of their businesses.

Were there any sort of, not to put you on the spot or anybody in the spot, but were there any standouts where you were like, huh, I’m surprised that they won’t sign it? 

Jove: I don’t know that there were standouts in that way. I think a lot of people are like, thank you for sharing this. Absolutely I’ll sign it.

And then there are a couple that the sales person is happy to sign it, but they’re not sure if the owner of the venue would sign it. And so it takes a little nudging and to be honest, it’s difficult. When a venue is very popular and when a venue is one you really want to work at, but it’s only through this pledge that you can discover what people are hiding behind. That they’re hiding homophobia, racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, antisemitism, all of these things, when people put out a beautiful Instagram and a beautiful product and all of your friends work there, you just think it’s a safe space and they’re good people.

Maya: Yeah.

Jove: But you don’t know until you ask. And then when you ask, when you get resistance, it says, everything it needs to say. We haven’t really like focused on the list of people who won’t sign it and I’m- 

Maya: Yeah.

Jove: rather focused on people who are excited to sign it, or take a form of it, and adopted it their own business or in their own business practices.

To me, that’s where the focus is, not so much on those that won’t. But I do have that list and it is, there was a mental note and I’m glad for the pledge in that reason. And also I’m sad that people are still in a position where they have hate or disdain for something, or discrimination for something they may not understand.

And so I hope that education and exposure can change them, because I think we all can grow and we all can change. And when you write someone off, you don’t allow them the opportunity to change. And that’s not fair. I think either 

Maya: I, the first time I heard you speak about how businesses can become more inclusive of the LGBTQ plus community, was at a beautiful event. And I remember that you were going over this idea of, the words you use matter. Again, that’s, it’s and I bring this up because, how do you form relationships? It’s the words that we exchange with each other. 

And the thing that ranks so true for me at that point was it’s not a bridal suite. It could be so many things. It’s not just brides getting any more, married anymore. It’s brides and grooms, and there’s all these combinations of, so why does it have to be the bridal suite? Why can’t it just be the wedding suite or why can’t it, or why does it have to be the bridal party or the bridal bouquet? It could just be, I forget, what was it called? Personal flowers. I think that’s what you call it. And to me,

Jove: Describe them as they are, not what you want them to be. 

Maya: Yeah. And I think that to me, I had a light bulb moment and I, because of course, at that time I was promoting a bridal show, which actually now we call, The Wedding Show.

And I was like, wait, hold on. This is not, because it wasn’t on purpose. It wasn’t also representative of the values that the show, the person that runs the show owns the company, my personal values. It’s just, we’re so socialized and unaware into using those words. It’s normal. Why would you, but it just set off such a light bulb moment for me to be like, wait, no, that’s because- that’s not because I’d reflect not about me, but that’s not the words I want to use because when I’m, because. I have no problems, but why am I using words that may indicate to somebody that I’m somehow not on their side or not, not welcoming of them. So it was such a light bulb moment. 

And how, do you listen for those things when you meet somebody? Does like, and you’ve spent so much time, like I said before, are there like standout things, in terms of stereotypes that you personally come up against, or as an industry, you have to, as the wedding industry, it’s of course, if you’re a man in the wedding industry, chances are you’re gay. Why would you be straight? There’s also reverse stereotypes in that sense. Like what would be one stereotype that you’ve come across that you’re like, come on guys, can we just retire this one? 

Jove: I think there are so many stereotypes and unfortunately our whole entire industry has been heteronormative, hetero-focused for the longest time. And I think change is really difficult.

And so, language, images, and actions are the three things we can do to change our industry. And it’s been my mission for many years to like, get that party started, to move the wheel forward for us. 

It’s you know, when I started in this industry, I couldn’t legally get married. So, I was throwing weddings for people. And it was something I wasn’t legally able to do myself. And I couldn’t understand why nobody else in the industry was talking about that, and why no one else in the industry was speaking up for us. I’m for sure, not the first gay wedding professional in this country or world. In fact, everyone above me, who’s been doing this for 20, 25 years.

Many of the preeminent designers and planners in our industry who are men, are gay, but to my knowledge, not one of them has taken a stand for equality or taking a stand for marriage equality. And not, because you’re gay, doesn’t mean you’re an activist. And because you’re gay, doesn’t mean you have to, to speak at a pulpit only about that.

We are multi-dimensional people, I’m more than my sexuality. That being said, I couldn’t to exist and grow in a world where I wasn’t welcomed, where I didn’t belong, where people weren’t using imagery, or language, or actions to attract me. In fact, they were using imagery, language, and actions to detract me.

And so, it became a mission for me because no one else was doing it on such a scale. And yeah, I think the stereotypes coming out all the time and I think I’m gay, so I must be great at design and I must be really into fashion. Or, I’m gay, so I must love this person or that person, or like you’re a straight woman.

Like, we all put stereotypes on people, our entire life personally, professionally, romantically. And I think the biggest push is we all have to stop assuming, and we have to start asking and we have to put up a pause in our process and really look at all the assumptions we’re making. We all make assumptions every day that are likely incorrect.

And it’s hard because the changes are minute, but it’s all of these little details that I think really matter and really move people forward in their life, professionally, personally, and romantically. And yeah, I think it’s the assumption that we all have to stop. 

Even as a gay man, I meet someone, I assume, if it’s a woman, they have a husband and a child. That’s the assumption that comes with. You’re married? I’d love to see a picture of your husband. That’s social, social- socializing growing up in a straight world with straight movies, straight love songs, and the narrative is always straight. And so, my new favorite thing is just to assume everyone’s gay. Until they tell me that they’re straight. 

Maya: I was just going to ask you, what is like the one thing, when you meet somebody, what do you ask them? I guess what, you just make the assumption they’re gay. 

Jove: Yeah. My new favorite thing to do is if I need a woman say, Oh my and they say they’re in a relationship. I’m like, Oh my God, I love to see a picture of her.

And to me it’s again, just to help turn it on its head because we all live in this heteronormative world and yes, the majority of the world’s population is straight. That is a fact. There’s no denying that fact.

Maya: You believe in science. 

Jove: Yes. They say one in seven people are queer, so we’re not a small percentage of the world and we don’t need to be written off, or discarded, or just told, cross out the word bride and right room.

Like to me, it’s so sad and heartbreaking that you, as a business in the industry of love, doesn’t have the patience or time to make everyone feel welcome. And yeah, I think that’s my new favorite thing is to just assume everyone’s gay and it’s fun to see the reactions because some people are like, Oh, I wish I was gay.

Or some people would get upset. And then I’m like, let’s work through why you’re upset, that I assumed you’re gay. You know what I mean? Is that, is it a bad thing to be gay? Like why do you have to unpack that in a negative way? And so again, it’s all about conversation. I don’t think change comes out unless you have conversations from a genuine point of view.

Maya: Speaking of conversations, you love starting conversations and you have this wonderful little dinner series called The Planners’ Dining Club. It it’s was little and now it’s, I think has a life of its own. Planners’ Dining Club, what was the Genesis of that? What brought around? Because, it looks like exactly the kind of thing somebody would want to go to. It’s beautiful. There’s like amazing people that attend. So what, tell me more about the. Planners’ Dining Club.

Jove: Yeah, when I first started Jove Meyer Events, we were getting emails from a lot of different caterers or venues inviting us to come in for a tasting, which is a, a logical thing. Planners bring business, bring them in. They can taste it. If they love it, they’ll refer us. 

So, it’s a natural thing that the news and caterers reach out to invite planners. But the reality was, many planners wouldn’t respond to those emails or they just weren’t interested, or they were too busy, or they were overwhelmed because they were getting so many requests.

And what people have to realize is our job first is to our clients. If we can’t take care of our clients, or bring in clients, then we have nothing to give to other vendors. So when all of these vendors want a meeting and a coffee and a tasting, like it’s great. And I wish I could just do that all day every day, but that doesn’t pay the bills and that doesn’t bring in clients. I understand why a lot of planners just didn’t respond or didn’t go to those tastings. 

I was new, and fresh, and eager. And I was like, I’m going to go to, I’m going to say yes to everyone. So I went to a tasting, it was terrible. It was just me, the chef, and the owner were sitting there and literally I was the only one eating and drinking and everything I did, they were like, Do you like it? Do you like it? And it was not delicious and it was awkward. And I was like, I’m never going to do this again. 

So the next one that came up, I invited three or four planner friends and said, Hey, why don’t we all go together? Just planners. We can have a little fun time, gossiping, hanging out and enjoying free delicious meals and experiencing a potential new vendor.

And so they were like, totally. So the caterer was thrilled because no one else had responded and here I am bringing four or five other planners. So that was the informal birth of the Planners Dining Club was really planners hanging out with the focus of food. And then from there it evolved. 

And, Spaces began to reach out. We would love to host you. Oh. And this cater would love to participate. And so it definitely took on a life of its own. And for me has been a really beautiful way to meet and experience new vendors that then I can confidently recommend to my couples or clients because I’ve seen their work, I’ve experienced their work. And so have all of these other planners. 

So yeah, it went from one really bad tasting to these sort of really over the top creative, beautiful dinners with a focus on community and creativity. And so for me, I love getting together with other planners. I love all the vendors in our industry, but there was nothing just for us. All the mixers, all the conferences, everything is for everyone, which is great, but photographers kind of had their own conference, florist have their own confe-

Like we don’t, there was nothing just for us where nobody was selling us or nobody was trying to higher than no, it was just us, so we could talk freely. Being a planner is a very fun thing, but also a very strange career and filled with so many stories, and highs, and lows. And being with other planners, there is a connection that’s there and to let loose together, it’s just so magical and it’s been such a fun journey.

And then the creativity came when it allowed me to be the client. So I could design whatever I wanted to design. There was no client in mind. And so, it allowed me to push the boundaries and do things that I’m wanting to do that maybe clients weren’t comfortable doing and then allowed the florist to do the same thing and the caterer to do the same thing.

And it was really like if you’re in a room full of the top planners, you can’t just have a simple centerpiece in a simple dinner. Like every time you have to have something new and fresh and exciting. And so that was the joy. It was pushing the boundaries of design and of events for fun. And yeah, we’ve done quite a few events and obviously not recently in the last year or so, but I miss it.

I miss it. And I love it at the same time. 

Maya: I can imagine. It’s very- we all miss being, we’re a very social group as an industry. events and weddings. We’re very social, in case you missed the memos. Super, super, social. But you just said something that I want to dive a little bit into, sort of, you get to be your own client.

Like you get to design for the joy of designing. What would you say, and again they’re all beautiful, and I know it’s like trying to pick your favorite child in this case, but which one would you say was like the one where you really loved creating? Like, the theme was right, the floors, everybody. And it was just like, it was just, it was better than you would have thought it could have been. 

Jove: Yeah. It’s so hard to be honest, because each one is so different. The one we did at the Wythe Hotel, the theme for me was organized chaos. 

So, I think in our line of work, we always want to be perfect, precise, the fork, the knife, that’s what we do. We strive for perfection. And I was like, let’s throw that all away. Let’s set the tables up in a weird-ass direction. Let’s put the fork on the wrong side. Let’s not perfectly fold the napkin. Let’s have the centerpiece and rolling vases so that they’re never perfect. Like all the OCD things that I check before every single guest arrived, I want it all to be intense and chaotic. 

Maya: Upside down.

Jove: So we had this weird, like flower tornado growing at an angle, and a bird on a swing. And just like, it was totally all over the place. And for me, it was so much joy because it was still such a fun night and it was such a fun party. 

We also did one I loved at The Green Building, I had been envisioning this like beautiful light structure where the lights would go all the way to the ceiling and make like a canopy of lights draped over the tables. And it was just so magical to see that come to life with the string quartet, playing modern pop songs in the background. When people walked in this winter day, playing with seasonality and space in a way that we don’t typically get to do, is the joy for me.

I don’t often do an event at The Green Building for 30 people because you can have 150, so we don’t get to do one long table in a huge warehouse. Yeah, I don’t know that I could pick one favorite. I love them all for very different reasons. And I love pushing the boundaries in all these spaces and I love- the interactions are different.

Maya: Has there been, sorry, go ahead. 

Jove: One on- we did one at the Brooklyn Grange and maybe that was my favorite because it had a dress code requirement. 

Maya: The orange, all the oranges and the reds of, yes. I’m not going to say what inspired it, but if you follow. Yeah, that was beautiful. That was actually stunning.

Jove: Thank you. Yeah, it was inspired by Wild Country, the documentary that is about a modern-day cult that moved from India to America. I-, and my father was actually a member in India. And-

Maya: One of those things where you like, know you think, your parents?

Jove: Yeah.

Maya: So I was watching this thing and I was talking to my mom about it and my mom goes, Oh yeah, Dad, we used to go to Osho, and I’m like, wait, what?

Jove: In India or in America? 

Maya: In India. 

Jove: Wow.

Maya: It was, so I was, this was the- again, talking about stereotypes, like you think of your parents. I was like,

Jove: Yeah, you had no idea. 

Maya: My dad? Again, you don’t know me, but I was like, Osho, Dad.

Jove: Yeah, I know. 

Maya: She goes, yeah, don’t get me started. 

Jove: Yeah, they all have Indian names. So like growing up, I was always like this so weird that my aunt’s names are like Nirjah, and Badra, and Zimbaba, like that’s so bizarre. Like we’re just like white European people. 

Like I don’t understand, but yes, so that documentary literally inspired an entire dinner and a wardrobe and we all sat on the floor and it was just this whole world that we were able to create. Based on that weird inspiration and everyone took the journey with me, like all the vendors, I was like, I have this idea, and I think Brooklyn Grange is perfect. It’s a rooftop farm, and I want everyone to wear orange or yellow, and I want everyone to recreate that vibe and people really showed up. The fashion was amazing. All the specialty cocktails were on color. The food was not like- 

Everyone was so incredible. And I think for me, that’s the joy. It’s showing people you don’t have to celebrate in a box of preconceived ideas and notions, that if you challenge that box, you can still have an amazing time. If not even like a more amazing time, because when have you been to a wedding or an event where you have to have a dress code of all orange, like when does that happens?

Maya: It’s always cocktails, and pretty, and sparkly, and blush, and under the ocean, if somebody gets really wild. But I do have to say, The Planners Dining Club has a bit of a cult following of its own at this point. So, the theme was very appropriate.

Jove: Thank you. 

Maya: No, but that is, this is also why I love these conversations. I would have never known this about you or you about me,-

Jove: Or, about your family. 

Maya: That’s the whole point of these. I love these conversations so much. 
I was going to ask you, what’s like the one thing people wouldn’t know about you, but I guess you answered that question there. 

Jove: Yeah. And I think there’s a lot people don’t know about me, but I was raised very religious, in a modern-day cult, and it was beautiful and challenging, at the same time. I was supposed to have an arranged marriage. And my parents tried when I was 16, 17, 18 and I politely declined ever year. And I was a good church boy, did three years of missionary work throughout the world. Yeah, it was a very interesting childhood for sure.

Maya: I cannot. That is a whole, that’s a whole different thing to unpack entire. That’s a whole another episode and hopefully, one day we will get to, but that is incredible. 

Which would also explain some of, your travel for love, your love for travel, and like all these different inspirations that you get. If you were doing missionary work, if you’ve traveled everywhere, I think travel informs so much of what you do creatively, that, we are going to unpack this though, one of these days. But that is, okay. I’m going to breathe now, that’s a lot. 

Jove: Buy me a bottle of wine and I’ll share it all. 

Maya: I thought you were the tequila person.

Jove: I am, but that’s- then it just gets spicy. It depends if you want truth, or like truth with a little drama.

Maya: I’m going to take you through truth with a little drama. 
If you would have the opportunity to mentor somebody, if this call were, if whoever somebody is listening in, what’s the one idea you would want somebody to take away in terms of when they meet new people? What’s one partying idea where you were like, this is hell you in good stead. Any answer, any which way, but like one idea that you would like somebody to take away with them.

Jove: I think you have to find your crew in this industry. And I think there is a natural desire to want to be at the top, to want to work with those who’ve been doing it the longest, who are the most well-known. And, I understand that urge and that desire. I had it when I first started as well. But the most valuable relationships I have are the ones I made of my peers who started at the same time. We all were newbies in the business. We were all figuring it out and we’ve all grown up together.

And those are the relationships I value the most because we’ve seen the rough times, the good times, our growth, our change. And I think it’s really about building your group of people, that are of your ethos, of your energy, that you really love one another. And building your world that way, and then all elevating together. Rather than this desire to start here and work with people who are here, whatever that means, being at the top.

So that means they have wealthier clients, that means they’re producing bigger events, that means they’re potentially working with celebrities. But does that, what does that do for you personally and professionally versus collaborating with people you can have a genuine long-term relationship with? Not that you can’t have those with people at the top, but they have their people that they’ve had long-term relationships with for 25 or 30 years.

So, I would say don’t undervalue your peers, because if you together create things that are amazing, magnetic and different, everyone will be watching and want to join in. 

Maya: That is very valuable. Your beginnings are not the same as other people’s beginnings and finding people that have your starting point helps you build that crew.

I, I actually did- that’s it. I’ll take that to heart. 

Jove: Yeah, no, and it’s true. And I had to tell that to myself because I’m a very driven person, and I want it to be at the top, and I want it to be the best, and I want it to be associated with certain people who were the best in our industry. And ultimately, at the end of the day, I was like, why am I chasing relationships that would be one sided? Right? 

We, why am I doing that? When I can just build my own world, my own relationships and create things that are so different and beautiful, that’s what will attract other people. And I’ll be filled with joy doing it, not exhausted from pretending to be someone else, to be friends with someone else. You know what I mean? Like it’s a, it was a big revelation for me, personally. And one that I always tell myself.

Maya: I always love talking too, I always learn something new. You always make me look at the world in a new way. Like I said, there was the idea of how you use language. It was, as you said, heartbreaking, when you know, they just tell it’s- you can make the effort to write groom or a couple versus whatever you think it needs to be. Client-

There’s so many words that make it every single time, Jove, when we meet and we have a conversation. You allow me to grow even like a little bit. And that makes,-

Jove: Thank you.

Maya: And I always enjoy our conversations. Sadly, we’re out of time, but if somebody wanted to follow you, get in touch with you, maybe ask you for that coffee, if they want it too. Where can they find you?

Jove: Instagram is the best. I respond, I manage our Instagram, my team does all the rest of the social media. So, every message there is me, every content there is myself. 

Email is also great. If it’s just a short message, Instagram is perfect. But if you want to write a book, I think is the better way to go, and that’s available on our website, hello@jovemeyers.com, is the email and jovemeyerevents.com is the website, and at @jovemeyer is our Instagram. 

Maya: Fantastic. I genuinely hope that you will get people that want to connect with you in a meaningful way, that
Jove, I appreciate your time as always.

Jove: Oh, thank you. It’s been so lovely chatting with you and seeing your face. I miss it.

Maya: I know. it. I miss it too, I miss everybody.

Jove: Yes, me too.